Men, Whose Tongues Are Sharp Swords

By Yvonne Ortega

 Men, whose tongues are sharp swords? Yes, some men have tongues like that. Maybe you date men, whose tongues are sharp swords or you’re married to one. What do you do to stop that abusive behavior?

Denial

Maybe you look the other way and pretend nothing is happening. Your family, friends, and coworkers see and hear it, but you can’t look at it. If you admit your spouse has a tongue like a sharp sword, then you must do something about it. The thought of confrontation and the work involved not to tolerate that abuse any longer may overwhelm you. It may seem easier to deny it.

“Cindy” stayed in an abusive marriage for years. She told me, “I thought all men talked to their wives that way. I didn’t think I could do anything about it.” 

Minimization

On the other hand, you may admit you date men, whose tongues are sharp swords, or you’re married to one. Perhaps you recite the children’s rhyme: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never break me.”

That isn’t true. Because of that abuse, you may suffer a broken heart, a crushed spirit, and a lack of self-respect.

You may say, “It’s not so bad. At least he doesn’t hit me. He’s never beat me up.”

He does beat you up with his mouth. Ask your children. They know, and it hurts them to see the way your husband disrespects you.

Rationalization

Perhaps you make an excuse for your husband. You say that he’s tired and works hard. Thousands of people are tired and work hard, but their tongues are not sharp swords.

You yourself may feel tired. You may work a full-time job outside of the home and another one at home. You clean house, shop for groceries, do the laundry, cook the meals, take care of the children, help them with their homework, and take them to their activities. Yet, your tongue is not a sharp sword.

Call to Action          

For your sake and that of your children, get into a free support group at a domestic violence shelter or seek individual counseling from someone who specializes in domestic violence.

Copyright © by Yvonne Ortega VI.XII.MMXVII

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