“Christmas is difficult, and I don’t know what to do,” Patty told me in a coffee shop. “I wish Christmas would go away.”

She added, “I miss my late  husband so much.”

Then Patty stopped, looked into my eyes, and said “To make matters worse, his parents act as if my husband’s heart attack and death were my fault. The doctor confirmed he had undetected heart problems before we married.”

Your circumstances may not be like Patty’s, but you’re still grieving. Take these three steps for the bereaved to get through Christmas.

THE FIRST STEP THE BEREAVED CAN TAKE WHEN CHRISTMAS IS DIFFICULT

The first step is to admit Christmas is difficult for you. Then, admit it to a trustworthy person, who can listen without judgment or unsolicited advice.

If you know that one of your friends is a legalist, will probably think less of you, and attempt to jam Scripture down your throat or do what she thinks is right, she isn’t the one you want to talk to.

Although you can talk to God about how difficult Christmas is for you, you may also want another human being you can see and touch at your side. Perhaps a life coach, a counselor, or your Sunday school teacher will be “God with skin on” for you.

THE SECOND STEP THE BEREAVED CAN TAKE WHEN CHRISTMAS IS DIFFICULT

The second step for the bereaved is to make a plan to get through Christmas.

Over dinner, a friend who lost her beloved husband told me, “I need a plan for Christmas. I don’t know what to do, but I don’t want to be alone.”

As we explored options, we came up with a plan that made her eyes sparkle.

She and I will spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day together. I’ll write about it afterward, and let you know how it went.

You can submit a comment and guess what my friend and I are going to do. If you do, I will put your name in the drawing for an Amazon gift card.

Another friend of mine is also a widow. Christmas is difficult for her and the children. They leave just before Christmas on a cruise. They planned it a year ago and saved enough money to make the trip possible.

Because one of my friends is going on a cruise, don’t think your plan requires more money than you can afford. A potluck dinner in your home with one or two friends can work. Afterward, you can enjoy one another’s company, play board games, or watch a movie.

What about a progressive supper with two or three friends? You can plan the appetizer and salad in one home, the main dish in a second one, and dessert in a third.

In the comment area, please share your current or past Christmas plan that worked for you. I will include your name in the drawing for an Amazon gift card.

THE THIRD STEP THE BEREAVED CAN TAKE

The third step for the bereaved is to thank God in advance for a great plan that will work. Last year, I planned a week in San Diego in December with my lifelong friend, Sharron. She was dying of pancreatic cancer.

I thanked God in advance for a great send-off to heaven for Sharron and how well my plan would work.

A year later, memories of that week with my friend warm my heart. Every time I remember it, I thank God again for holiday pancakes at iHop, Christmas drinks at Starbucks, and the Christmas program at church with a live nativity.

I Thessalonians 2:16a–17: “May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father . . . encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.”

Prayer: God, please encourage my heart and strengthen me to take those three steps because Christmas is difficult for me. Amen.

Call to Action: Remember for a chance to win an Amazon gift card, submit a comment to guess what my friend and I are going to do, or to share your current or previous plan for Christmas that worked for you.

I will draw the winner’s name on Sunday, December 23, 2018 at 5:00 pm EASTERN.

Related Posts:

https://www.YvonneOrtega.com/how-will-you-celebrate-christmas-day/

https://www.YvonneOrtega.com/special-memories-of-christmas/

Copyright © by Yvonne Ortega XII.XVII.MMXVIII