Power Plans to Make Mother’s Day Easier for You
May these power plans make Mother’s Day easier for you. Countless triggers flash across your eyes or penetrate your ears and pierce your heart. Let’s take a look at the plans to empower you in time for Mother’s Day.
May these power plans empower you in time for Mother's Day. #divorce, #grief Share on XPower Plans for the never married woman on Mother’s Day
Situation
If you’ve never married and have no children, you may not want to celebrate Mother’s Day. Some adults play matchmaker or ask, “Why haven’t you married? What you need is a husband and children.”
Plan
Perhaps it’s time to set a boundary with them. As you smile, look into their eyes and tell them, “You can retire from your matchmaker services. I’m happy as a single woman. Mother Theresa never married or had children. And yet, she’s called a mother and left an international legacy.”
If you desire marriage, trust God to give you his best in his perfect timing.
To make Mother’s Day easier for the infertile mother
Situation
A woman and her husband tried for ten years to have a child. Nothing worked. They traveled around the country to try every new method or clinical trial. Each time they didn’t get the baby they wanted, they felt defeated, discouraged, and depressed. The husband blamed his wife and divorced her.
Plan
After a few years, she made peace with her circumstances and now pours into the lives of nieces, nephews, and the children of neighbors and friends. She also forgave her ex-husband for her own sake to move forward and make a better life for herself.
Power Plans to make Mother’s Day easier after the loss of a child
Situation
More than a decade ago, my only child died three days after Mother’s Day. With the anniversary of his death, Mother’s Day, and his birthday all in May, Mother’s Day initially was a a triple whammy. I’ve learned to look forward to something special that day.
The Bible assures me that my child and I will see each other again for eternity. Until then, he can’t call or visit me. He can’t send me a card or a gift.
Plan
If you face a similar situation, you may get through Mother’s Day with friends. You may plan a potluck meal in one home or a progressive dinner. In case, you don’t know what that means, here’s a brief explanation of it: the appetizer at one home, a salad with bread and butter at another, the main meal at a third home that you can all chip in to cover the cost, and dessert with tea or coffee at the last home. Rather than a potluck meal or a progressive dinner, choose takeout or curbside pickup, and gather at one location.
Options for the woman who left the hospital with empty arms
Situation
A friend suffered five miscarriages. Each time she left the hospital with empty arms, she felt brokenhearted and like a failure. Her husband refused to adopt a child, which added to her anguish.
Plan
What can mothers of miscarriage do? They are still mothers. Their “angel babies” await them in heaven. They have every right to celebrate Mother’s Day. They can also search on Facebook or elsewhere online for the International Bereaved Mother’s Day event to find the closest one and receive encouragement and support.
Even if you lost your child through miscarriage, you are still a mother. #Mother's Day, #Miscarriage Share on XMake Mother’s Day easier after a mother’s death
Situation
The same year my son died three days after Mother’s Day, Mama passed away before Mother’s Day. Who would fill in the gap? Mom is usually our biggest cheerleader, the one who waves the pompoms, and assures us we can do whatever we chose.
Plan
You may feel certain no one can ever take her place, but ask God to bring a spiritual mom or mentor for you. You’ll feel delighted when that prayer brings you not one, but two or three who provide for your needs in different ways.
What to do when Mom abused or neglected you
Situation 1
Not every adult had a good mother. She may have done the best she could with what she knew. Your mother may be addicted to alcohol or other drugs. Because of her addiction, perhaps you don’t know where your mother is, or if she’s alive. To the best of your ability, you chose to avoid celebrating Mother’s Day. Then, you had children.
Situation 2
As a child, you may have been physically, emotionally, or sexually abused by your mother. Maybe your father was the perpetrator, and your mother did nothing to protect you. You probably didn’t celebrate Mother’s Day either. Now you have children.
Plan
Journal about the women who came alongside you over the years to help you. Perhaps certain books or movies gave you an understanding about addiction and helped you forgive for your sake. They also guided you in how to enjoy your children or grandchildren and keep them safe. If not, it’s never too late to learn. For starters, watch the movies, 28 Days and Smashed found on YouTube or iTunes.
The Hallmark US TV Network and social media
Situation
The United States Hallmark TV network runs special movies about mothers during the month of May. It also floods their TV commercials to remind viewers to buy their mother cards, flowers, chocolates, or jewelry. They can add to a mother’s emptiness. She doesn’t need painful reminders every five minutes about what to get Mom for her big day.
Plan
Turn off the Hallmark channels during the month of May. Skip Mother’s Day weekend on social media until you feel strong enough to see mamas’ and grandmas’ pictures of their little ones and their reunions. Plan something else until you can post pictures of your children if you so desire.
Related Internal Link:
How to Handle A Crisis Mother’s Day Weekend
Recommendations to overcome spiritual insensitivity on Mother’s Day
Situation
In some churches or organizations, the pastor or facilitator stands at the pulpit and wishes the mothers a Happy Mother’s Day. Then he asks the mothers to stand to find out who the oldest mother is, the youngest one, the one with the most children, and the pregnant mom. Our losses seem more agonizing during such a service.
Plan
You can try one of two recommendations. Stay home if the service leaves you in an emotional state. One woman said, “I couldn’t go to church on Mother’s Day the first four years.”
Another way would be to speak to the women in your Bible study or church and ask them not to wish you a “Happy Mother’s Day” that Sunday because it’s not a happy one for you. After not going to church three years in a row, one woman kept telling herself she could do it because the women understood what not to say. The minute she walked into the church, one of the women from the Bible study said, “Happy Mother’s Day.”
She turned around and returned home. Over the years, her fragile heart has become stronger with God’s grace and community support. She realizes the woman meant well and probably forgot. She forgave her and now attends.
Related Outside Link:
Grieving Your Mother on Mother’s Day
For the divorced on Mother’s Day at buffets
Situation
Because of the buffet and brunch specials on Mother’s Day, the hostess may hand each woman a carnation. The women may come in with a bouquet of flowers or a corsage along with their children and other family members. A photographer or two may roam the venue. In-laws may want to be with the single parent who has custody of the children.
Plan
Make the meal as pleasant and peaceful as possible for both the custodial parent and child. Mom, use your power to invite only those you want there. Usually on Mother’s Day, the mother has the children, and on Father’s Day, the dad does. Exceptions exist.
You may find it easier to eat at home, pick up something to eat the day before, or have a meal delivered.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 and 4:
“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven . . . A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.”
Prayer:
Dear God, please help hurting women get through the month of May. Bless them with comfort, hope, and peace. Remind them of your promises of eternal unconditional love and the reunion that awaits them in heaven. Give them permission and creative ways to leave a legacy.
Next Step:
If this article applies to you, what will you do this week to weep and mourn your losses and then with time, to laugh and dance? If it doesn’t apply to you, please feel free to share this article with a woman who could use it.
Copyright © by Yvonne Ortega May 8, 2017 Updated on May 15, 2021
