You can stop the emotional roller coaster of divorce and get off. Take charge of your life, and you can survive.
At the beginning. you may feel out of control. Feelings are not facts. Since they aren’t, they cannot control you.
You Can Move From Fear to Faith in Divorce
- You choose the path you take.
- Don’t believe the lie that you’re stuck in fear and hopelessness.
- Turn from fear to faith one step at a time.
- You may have several questions: “How can I make it alone? How can I support myself? Where will I live that’s safe and affordable? What will our adult children think?”
- Let’s take those questions one at a time.
You Are Not Alone
- The great news is that you are not alone.
- Whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, you were made for community.
- Your personality will determine how much community and how often.
- You can find encouragement, support, and accountability in live or online support groups.
- Hobby clubs and interest groups will offer you fun, fellowship, and fresh ideas.
- You can find transitional housing from a local shelter.
- As a woman of faith, you can cling to God’s promise, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged” (Deut 31:8, NIV)
You Can Find Employment in the Midst of a Divorce
- Write a resume, which is a concise and current list of your education, skills, and experience along with your contact information and references.
- Make simple business cards with your headshot, skills, and contact information.
- Check spelling and grammar on both the resume and business cards.
- Also have two others check.
- Keep a record of date, time, place, and persons with whom you spoke and what kind of job it was.
- Go to the state employment office in person or online.
- Check with the temp services listed in your area and fill out applications.
- A friend can download the applications if you don’t have the electronics to do so.
- If you prefer not to go alone, take someone with you.
- Attend job fairs online or in person.
- Talk with recruiters at places where you would like to work.
- Tell everyone you know and those in your social circles that you need a job.
- Have a positive attitude and thank everyone including God in advance for the perfect job and coworkers for you.
Chaos to Confidence
- You can survive and move from chaos to confidence.
- Use caution in your daily life.
- Avoid texts, email, and posting on social media.
- Those safety measures will keep the other person from twisting and using what you say against you.
- In that way, electronic spyware and other methods will not disarm you.
- Seek advice from a hair stylist to look professional and confident.
- Get a free makeup consultation either online or in person to highlight your natural beauty.
- “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed” (Prov 15:22, ESV).
Music for your heart and soul
To help you look for good to come, listen to praise and worship music. Two songs I recommend are:
- “Praise You in This Storm” sung by Casting Crowns
- “I Need Thee Every Hour,” a more traditional hymn sung by Fernando Ortega. In case you’re wondering, I’m not related to Fernando.
- You can find both songs on Youtube.
You will become more hopeful, because the music will help you focus on who God is. This is better than being stuck in how big your problems are. God is bigger, stronger, and able to help you.
Scripture:
“May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word” (2 Thess 2:16–17 NIV).
My Prayer for you:
God, divorce has turned (Put your name here and in all the blanks) world upside down, but (_______) places this burden in your hands. (_______) is worried about finances, the adult children, and an affordable place to live in a safe neighborhood. Give (_______) strength to leave her needs and those of the children in your care and not try to take them back to worry about. You know (_________) heart and love (_______) more than (_______) can imagine. Fill (_______) with your eternal encouragement and good hope. Please strengthen (_______) in all (_______) says and does. Amen.
Related External Link:
Hope for the Journey through Divorce
Related Internal Link:
A Three-Day Coaching Intensive? What’s Included?
Copyright © by Yvonne Ortega November 26, 2018. Updated on May 11, 2021.
